Welcome home, where you been?
Winter here has been so long
Leaving this house is a sin
See it here, and we think:
“Golly gee, look at this place
That assessment’s a disgrace”
Taxing games can fix that mistake… ache

You are only here part time
You don’t feed our appetite
When you hear the door chime
We’ll take a look inside
It’s not unfair, it’s worth a shot
Like gambling houses and legalized pot
Grab your check book, that’s a start
Finding new cash is a politician’s true art

Our budget’s in the billions, as in millions with a “b”
We may not educate your childrens, but your house is by the sea
Ask any economist, he’ll tell you we’re insane
But you know we love taxpayers, like hunters love game

Cause our spending is reckless, we’ll tax you to the sky
And our legal system’s feckless, though our expats don’t know why
Ask any economist, she’ll tell you we’re insane
But we’ve got a blank check, baby, and we’ll sign your name

It’s a privilege, can’t you see
To have this perfect paradise
In the bill, on line twenty,
“Non-owner occupied”
Owning land is a franchise
You will profit when someone buys
We let you keep it, it’s not a right… oh, wait

Average people own land, too
Why let those leeches off the hook?
They won’t pay as much as you
But there are more of them
What a treasure we have found
A money tree built on the ground
More will come when your group leaves
Town council nightmare’s the governor’s daydream

Our budget’s in the billions, as in millions with a “b”
We may not educate your childrens, but your house is by the sea
Ask any economist, he’ll tell you we’re insane
But you know we love taxpayers, like hunters love game

Cause our spending is reckless, we’ll tax you to the sky
And our legal system’s feckless, though our expats don’t know why
Ask any economist, she’ll tell you we’re insane
But we’ve got a blank check, baby, and we’ll sign your name

Rhode Island’s done this since Berlin’s fall
You saw the writing on the wall
Rhode Island’s done this since Berlin’s fall
You saw the writing on the wall

Who could take a true thing
Sprinkle it with spin
Cover it with context ’till the truth is wearing thin?

PolitiFact.  PolitiFact can.
PolitiFact can because they write it like it’s news
And make the bias sound good.

Who can take a fact check
Put it to a vote
Help out politicians who are rowing the same boat?

PolitiFact.  PolitiFact can.
PolitiFact can because they write it like it’s news
And make the bias sound good.

Those reporters pick ev’ry little trick
From pedantry to omission
You could say it’s just their mission
We all know they’re really always out there fishin’

Who can troll on Twitter
For Sunday’s front-page spread,
Make you think their beat is building talking points instead?

PolitiFact.  PolitiFact can.
PolitiFact can because they write it like it’s news
And make the bias sound good,
And the bias sounds good because the media thinks it should.